Using hypnotherapy to build your confidence

A stage hypnotist told me once that all confidence is an act. I’m not sure whether that is factually correct, but it’s a nice thing to hold on to at times of vulnerability. Most of us have at least one thing in life that we feel confident doing. However, we probably all have more things that we do not feel confident doing. Whether you feel empowered enough to act confident doing the things you lack confidence in is another story!

Hypnotherapy for confidence

Confidence is a very general term. Social confidence, for example, is different to being a confident swimmer. Confidence in talking to your boss is different to confidence in presenting to your colleagues. Hypnosis for confidence will help you achieve your goal regardless of the specifics.

A hypnotherapy confidence session is always personalised to the client. However, there are three tools I will incorporate into each session for my client to use at home, increasing their confidence by the day. These are things that you can use at home too.

1. A human brain does not differentiate between real and imagined situations. This means when you imagine something, it reacts as if it were happening. It also holds onto the experience. This is obvious when you consider how your heart races during a scary movie, or you feel emotional when you hear a story. When you feel a lack of confidence, schedule some time into your diary to visualise the thing you want to do. If time is short, you can take five minutes before you fall asleep at night and five minutes before you wake in the morning. 

The best way to do this is to run through the expected experience from beginning to end, in as much detail as possible. Always keep your visualisation positive, imagining exactly what you want to happen. If you lack confidence in social situations, see yourself standing tall, with your head held high. When you do this, you give yourself the opportunity to create some conversation starters to help you feel relaxed in the situation.

Do the same for any part of you that needs a boost in confidence. See yourself in the job interview. An answer to all the questions, a clear reasonable response for anything you feel unsure of, and the confidence to ask relevant questions back. Use this tool regularly to top up your confidence.

2. In a confidence hypnotherapy session, I will help my clients create a character for themselves, an alter ego if you like. It doesn’t matter whether you find hidden parts of yourself or model the strengths of others. I ask my clients to give this character an outfit, with props, a stance, and some personality traits.

During the hypnotherapy session, they become this character in their mind. This includes stepping into the outfit and taking hold of the props (I remember a client that wanted to increase their confidence with public speaking. They created a character that held a walking cane and wore a top hat. Before each public speaking event, they closed their eyes and imagined picking up the cane and popping the top hat on their head as they became the confident public speaker). 

Take time to create your character, maybe it will even change over time or for different situations. You’ll soon get to know your character so well, it will take only a few seconds to bring that part of you to the surface.

3. Mindfulness is the art of keeping your mind and body in the present moment, while permitting all physical feelings and emotions in your body, without judgement. When you live mindfully, you view all emotions as equal and valid. You also give yourself permission to experience the feelings and emotions without trying to run from them. A lack of confidence stems from a fear in your abilities.

Someone who lives mindfully will feel this fear or discomfort and accept it, but not let it interfere in the things they want to do. Mindfulness is something that takes regular practice. Daily meditation is a way to sit with your feelings without categorising them as positive or negative. There are many mindfulness exercises that will increase your skills and help you feel able, even when feeling diffident. 

Hypnosis for self-esteem

Confidence is the belief you have in your abilities, contrasting to self-esteem, which is the way you feel about yourself. Although the two overlap in some ways, for example, you may lack confidence in something because you have low self-esteem, the therapy is slightly different. When you have hypnotherapy for low self-esteem, the therapist will help you view yourself more positively, which may then naturally help your confidence. Your therapist will ask you questions and talk to you about whether it is better to work on your self-esteem or whether self-confidence hypnosis will help you.