Letting the ghosts of your past go?
Some allow past events to dominate their present and accept that that’s just the way it is. However it is possible to keep bringing yourself back to the now – “the present” and whilst remembering events and people from the past – it isn’t necessary to carry forward the emotion of these things – it is possible to leave the emotion behind and simply bring what you learned from those events into the present. The past owes you nothing - it gave you the knowledge that you have now - you need to enjoy the now and if the past is affecting your “now” you probably need to leave the ghosts of the past behind?
If events or conversations really upset us we may examine those events or conversations to try to understand our part and to see what we can learn from it, to see if we can prevent the same happening again. If we find a logical explanation then usually we can move on. Over time our memories of these events may fade and eventually we get things into context. For some people though a lack of closure can cause a cycle of thinking. Cycling the same memories time and time again can make that cycle a habit that is very difficult to break out of. The cycle can also become addictive and a cycle of repetition of the same thoughts perpetuates.
Hypnotherapy can help you see those events and memories in a different context. The hypnotherapist will help you imagine and visualise things from a different perspective. By Imagining and visualising things differently we find that our perception is subjective. It then becomes possible to break out of the cycle of memories and repetitive behaviour because we can now more readily visualise a different path.
It can be particularly difficult to let go of memories if things changed extremely quickly and it was a shock. If you have experienced a sudden death or the ending of a relationship without warning then you may devote a lot of thinking to events as your mind tries to understand and bargain with why this has happened. Normally this is a phase of grief that people move on from, yet some of us find the same thoughts repeating. After a while you may be experiencing something similar to post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). The thoughts pop into your mind almost involuntarily and unleash a raft of emotions. Sometimes there can be a very pronounced physiological response - sweaty palms, shortness of breath, feelings of panic etc. These thoughts may become anchored to your routines, to objects or even places (a process known as “anchoring”). As the pattern repeats a process of association strengthens the links. Over time the repetitive thoughts are almost automatic.
A hypnotherapist can help you see the memories from a different perspective. He can help you dissociate from the events and remove your emotional responses. He can help change how you feel about the anchors to your daily routine, the places and objects that you associated with painful memories. Very often you will experience major relief from painful memories in just one session and may not require further hypnotherapy, though please be realistic that Hypnotherapy is not a silver bullet and more sessions may be desirable. This is not that same as changing your memories – it is simply reducing the emotional response from them. You can remember events without the upset.
You should find that hypnotherapy can help you let the ghosts of the past go for good and lay them to rest. One life – live it now.
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About Jeff Cassapi
Grief can play a major part in most people's lives. Losing a loved one through death or a major relationship break up can be one of the most stressful things you will experience.
My Dad passed 18 years ago and I have encountered lots of clients that are hugely affected by grief.… Read more
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