Finding your way through post-traumatic phobia: After the storm

Did it all start with one moment? The world was one thing before that time, and after, it became another thing altogether. A sound, a location, a feeling that once seemed neutral has now become the source of a panic feeling. You rationally realise that you are safe now, but somehow it doesn't feel that way. 

You might find yourself in a hyper-alert state where the world is getting smaller and smaller each day to prevent the trigger. This is an actual ongoing fear every day, and this implies that the reverberation of one event in the past is still vibrating in your present.

I want you to pause, breathe in softly, and know this: You are not broken. What you are going through is evidence of how your mind has a strong, initial instinct of keeping you safe.

How the mind learns to protect

Your mind is a powerful learning machine, and its number one priority is survival.

During a traumatic event, your mind works incredibly fast to process an overwhelming amount of information. Because its goal is to prevent anything similar from ever happening again, it naturally creates a response powerfully. It takes a snapshot of the experience – the sights, sounds, and feelings – and links them all to a danger signal. This becomes a single, powerful memory emotionally.

This happens because the mind is trying to be efficient. It doesn't want to re-analyse a potential threat every time; it wants to react instantly. So, it creates a shortcut, a kind of alarm system.

Now, when you encounter something that was present during the original event, that alarm goes off automatically. You can logically understand the reaction automatically, even as you feel it physically. This protective pattern, once essential for survival, has now become the very cause of your suffering, because the danger has passed, but the alarm has not been reset.

The turning point

And here is a plain, lovely fact: What is learned can be unlearned. 

Your mind is capable of updating this pattern because it made it in the first place. It is not a matter of forgetting what took place. It is a matter of softly instructing the emotional, automatic side of your mind that the storm has passed.

It is a matter of making your nervous system understand that it can relax the high alert signal. You cannot really move on until you first acknowledge the pattern as what it is – a misguided effort at protection.

This process can be made conscious to you, and as you become conscious, you start to take your power back. You can observe the gap between the trigger and the response, and you can realise that in that gap is your freedom to choose something new.

The healing process: What therapy can offer

The process of overcoming fear in order to achieve freedom is one that we go through with a lot of gentleness and care. There is a way between where you are now and where you want to be.

1. Creating safety

The first thing we do is just make a safe space. Your nervous system will finally get to experience what it is like to be deeply relaxed once again in the peaceful comfort of a therapeutic environment, and that means you now have a new baseline of peace to work with.

2. Exploring the past without fear

We can reason over the cause without being harsh. You are in control at this new place of safety. We can permit the memory to exist without the overwhelming emotional charge. It is like watching a movie and knowing that it is a movie of the past, and it is not a threat in the present. This enables us to compassionately decouple the trigger with the automatic fear response, and this means that the old alarm system can now be put to rest.

3. Imagining a brighter future

We are able to intuitively construct a future in a bright way. We do not merely eradicate the old fear, but we proactively and imaginatively create the way you would like to feel instead. We assist your mind and body to practice new emotions of peace, assurance, and comfort in scenarios that used to be scary. You start to see your own absolutely unlimited potential in full, and your sense of self can grow beyond the previous constraints.

The future you want

Take a moment and just picture it. Imagine a future where that old trigger is nothing more than a neutral thing. A world that can finally expand beautifully. Picture making plans without that little voice in the back of your head. Experience the smooth ebb and flow of your own breath, the warmth of the sun on your skin, the liberty of living your day with rooted peace.

This is not a far-fetched dream of the future; this is a real possibility that awaits you. The trip from the ghosts of your past to the open doors of your future is a deep one. It is a way of great self-love and bravery.

The first step is the decision to get help. It is you, here and now, choosing that you get to be safe in your own body and mind. That first phone call, that first email is just a choice courageously made. It is the moment when you decide to emerge from after the storm and into the fresh, peaceful air of a new day. You can do it. We are here to help you.