We all get angry. The feeling can come from many places; whether you feel frustrated, someone has insulted you, or you feel under attack, anger is a natural response to many events that happen in our lives.
The feelings that we feel and the actions of others aren’t always up to us, but, what we decide to do with those feelings – that is up to us. So, what’s the best way to deal with it, when you reach boiling point and are ready to explode?
We discuss five ways that can help you deal with your anger head-on.
1. Don’t ignore it
Your heart rate is picking up, you can feel your temperature rising. Don’t just ignore those warning signs, hoping it will all go away.
It’s not about preventing anger or ignoring it, but processing how we feel and dealing with that in a productive and healthy way. Learning how to treat ourselves and others as we move through anger is the true lesson that many of us need to learn.
2. Take a time out
A simple way to help you manage your anger when a trigger situation arises is to give yourself some time before you react. So, get away from the situation and do something else. This will allow you to really think about how you react, rather than reacting instinctively.
You could try:
- Taking some long, deep breaths.
- Counting to 10, to give you enough time to calm yourself before you react.
- Creating a calming playlist and listening to it when you start to feel angry.
3. Don’t take it out on other people
Especially people that you love. Hurtful comments can stay with someone for longer than you’d like to think. Ask yourself whether the person you’re imparting your anger on deserves to be treated like this.
Try to remember what it feels like when other people take their anger out on you. So, if you do snap, be mindful of their feelings and consider whether you need to apologise.
4. Once you are calm, then express your anger
In the heat of the moment it’s easy to scream and shout, but don’t speak without thinking. Take time to process your thoughts and understand if your reaction is rational. Try to explain the cause of your anger, sticking with “I” statements, as this is likely to help the other person be more receptive to your feelings. For example, “I feel excluded” vs. “you’re excluding me”.
5. Identify possible solutions
Don’t be the person that only voices problems – consider solutions, and voice them instead.
But, more than anything, know when to seek help. Hypnotherapy can help those with anger management problems in several ways, by helping you to understand the root cause of your anger. Anger management hypnotherapy can also help with some of the symptoms of anger. For example, if you are suffering from anxiety, stress or depression.
If you feel unable to manage your anger on your own, use our search tool to find a professional near you.