Should you celebrate your small wins?
Do you have that one friend who continually achieves, yet does not appear to notice their own success? Chances are you notice their success because you compare it to your own. My friend has a lovely plaque in her house with the quote, “comparison is the thief of happiness”. I enjoy the reminder when I spend time in her home.
It is a struggle to walk through life without comparison but when you celebrate your small wins you will remember your own worth.
The definition of success is the accomplishment of an aim or purpose. When you travel through life following your purpose you will achieve your own success. However, when you compare that success to others it will seem less important because the basis of their success is their own purpose. If you establish your purpose and celebrate your success, you will find less reason to compare yourself to others.
Establishing your purpose
Your life purpose is something you choose. If your focus of control is external rather than internal you might find yourself waiting for a guide to bring it to you. If you wish to take more control of your life and establish your purpose, a positive way to start is to write a list of the things you enjoy. The things that make you want to get out of bed in the morning rather than pull the duvet over your head and hide for the rest of the day.
Next, write a list of your values, what do you feel passionate about? Twice recently I received blank stares when I put this question to another. I used the example of plastic straws in the ocean to help one with her own thoughts and left the other with time to ponder the question.
When you have a list of things that you enjoy and things you value, you have the beginnings of your purpose.
Under this list, describe for yourself your perfect life. If you had a magic wand in your hand and the power to change anything you wish, how would you create your life? Remember your values to prevent a self-centred perfect life and to help you to remain a part of the world.
Writing this is a good enough start, your life purpose does not need to be put out to the world. It is something for you to refer to regularly. When you live your life in line with your values and preferences, it is easier to let go of comparisons and anxieties because you have control of your life script.
Celebrating your success
Your life purpose will help you to form some short-term goals. When you write your goals focus on personal and professional. One goal to reach a specific point in your career leaves your personal life unimportant. Personal and professional goals will help you to maintain a work-life balance that aligns with your purpose.
Some people believe that short term goals bring greater happiness than long-term. A long-term goal makes for a lifetime of focus on the struggle to achieve rather than a celebration of the achievements. Long-term goals often leave little room for diversion or adaptation as you change.
When you write multiple short-term goals, you move closer to a long-term desire and give yourself the opportunity to feel successful as you go.
It is important to recognise your small successes at each point. Some people like to keep a success jar in which they keep notes of all their small wins. Whenever they experience a moment of self-doubt, as we all do, they open the jar and take some time to reflect on their previous achievements.
As your achievements become your normal it is easy to forget the effort and commitment it took in the moment. Always celebrate in the moment, even if you do so quietly by yourself, it is important you feel celebrated. At the same time, keeping a note will remind you of your own positive qualities.
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