Taking control of your anxiety

Your mind won’t let it go. You’re replaying yesterday’s conversation, analysing every word. Did you say too much? Not enough? The cycle never stops - planning, overthinking, doubting. It’s exhausting. But this is your normal, constantly mulling things over, and you don’t remember a time when your mind didn’t work like this.

If you have a plan for the evening, you will run through every minor detail from what you will wear, to how you will enter the building. What will you say to the people you speak with? What will you do if you cannot see anybody you know? What will you eat, what will you drink? Will you sit or stand?

You will be worrying and planning, worrying, and planning. When you do not have an event, you'll be thinking about the day’s interactions, or yesterday’s interactions, or why you have not had any interactions.

This is you, it's normal. It's hard work. You feel exhausted.

You’re starting to wonder if the thoughts and feelings you experience are anxiety.

For some people, there are physical symptoms that accompany the thoughts. This week in my hypnotherapy practice I worked with two separate clients that, at the recommendation of paramedics, travelled to the hospital via ambulance due to intense chest pain. The diagnosis, for both? Anxiety.

It is important to take the physical feelings that accompany anxiety seriously. At times anxiety is debilitating but you don’t have to accept it, it doesn’t have to be this way.

Recognising anxiety

Calling it out is the first step in the road to a calmer life. Anxiety disconnects you from the present moment. To recognise it means shifting from a state of autopilot to awareness. The symptoms of anxiety include:

• negative self-talk
• heart racing / palpitations / chest pain
• feeling different
• feeling as though your brain is going to explode
• overthinking
• sleep disruptions

If you have had a lifetime of defining yourself by these characteristics, it is time to separate them from you.

Understanding the physiological response

Considered a mental health issue, anxiety leaves the impression that it is all in the mind. Anxiety exists when your brain perceives something as a threat to your life. As a result of this threat, your brain prepares you to deal with it in a physical way. Like a rabbit caught in the headlights, your brain wants you to freeze, run or fight.

Your brain activates the sympathetic nervous system and sends you into a hyper-alert state. Your heart starts to race so the blood moves oxygen around your body quicker. The pupils dilate so you can see better.

Ever seen someone with a wide-eyed stare? What is the betting they are struggling with anxiety too?

Your breathing speeds up so your lungs can take in more oxygen, alongside an infusion of glucose into the bloodstream to give you a boost of energy. Your body is a powerhouse, working instinctively to keep you safe from harm. Hypnotherapy moves you from the sympathetic response into the parasympathetic. Your system remains aware but calm. Instead of the rapid breathing, tight chest and sweaty symptoms of anxiety, you remain in control and comfortable with a remarkable focus.

Gratitude for the brain and body

Only, meeting your friend for lunch is not a threat to your life. Neither is going out for dinner this evening. Oh, and the work meeting, that’s not a threat to your life either. Just for the record, neither is you not becoming the person your parents expect you to be.

Your brain exists to protect you, but in this instance it’s like an overactive security alarm, going off at the slightest movement. The good news? You can reset the system.

The more aware you are of yourself, the more you can take control of yourself.

Taking control

Negative thoughts accentuate the symptoms of anxiety. After years of working with anxiety, I’ve noticed a pattern. People become experts in anxious feelings. But what if you became an expert in calm instead?

When you wake in the morning you find yourself scanning your body to check for signs of anxiety. Is your heart racing? Can you breathe easily? You obsess so much over the physical feelings of anxiety that you know them better than anything else.

I would like you to stop reading for a moment and take a deep breath. Notice how your body feels - not the tension, but the spaces of ease. Even if it's small, focus on that feeling. The more you do this, the more your brain learns calm is safe. Hold on to the physical feelings you notice when you take a moment to pause.

• How does your chest feel?
• What do your arms and legs feel like?
• How is your head?
• What do you feel in your stomach?

By transitioning your focus, you can specialise in the 'comfortable' you. A you that feels at peace, free of anxiety. Become a master at knowing the feelings that accompany this state of mind, so that you can use the skills you have perfected to stay here.

There is a mantra I love: The more you focus on what you want rather than what you do not want, the more you will achieve what you want rather than what you do not want.

When you want to feel calm, recall the feelings. Remember what your arms felt like when you paused. Imagine this feeling travelling through each arm, into your hands and fingers. Do the same for your legs, chest, and face.

Use the power of your mind to recreate the feelings of calm. The more regularly you do this, the more likely it is to become your habitual state.