New year, new worries? Using values to keep anxiety at bay

The excitement and reflection at the New Year can bring a tonne of emotions that can cause an underlying hint of anxiety. January is traditionally considered a time to reset and refocus fuelled by societal and personal expectations. If the past year felt tricky, you might feel eager to move into next year, but be careful with how much pressure you put on yourself with a new year, new you approach.

Why the New Year can trigger anxiety

The pressure to reflect

In the days after Christmas, there isn’t much happening. It can feel like the perfect time to reflect on the year gone by. Take time to think about your accomplishments and the things you might do differently next time. Keep an eye on yourself to prevent this becoming a negative spiral of self-criticism and regret.

New Year resolutions

You’re going to join the gym and go every day, you’re going to quit smoking, drink less, socialise more, work on your career etc. The list of self-improvement is endless. It’s easy to fall into the trap of believing that when you change one small thing, you’ll become a new person. I once worked with a smoker who realised they’d failed to quit so many times, because every time they did, they assumed they’d also join the gym, start eating healthily, and stop scrolling their phone. All it took was me to remind them that it’s ok to remain themselves – without a cigarette in their hand. The permission to not go to the gym, continue scrolling their phone, and drink Diet Coke made it much easier to stop smoking.

The stress of resolutions

The pressure to set New Year Resolutions can make you feel inadequate as you are. A reminder that you are not enough and need to do better. This can lead to feelings of stress and eventually anxiety as you try to meet your own expectations and feel bad about yourself if you don’t.

Fear of the unknown

If the new year feels like a whole new chapter of life, you might worry about what is ahead. Will you face challenges? This uncertainty can lead to overthinking and make the future feel daunting, rather than exciting.

Recognising the signs of anxiety

Anxiety doesn’t always announce itself with a dramatic panic attack; it shows up in quieter, more insidious ways. You might notice:

• Physical symptoms: Tension, restlessness, or fatigue.
• Mental patterns: Overthinking, intrusive thoughts, or feeling stuck in worry.
• Emotional impact: Irritability, overwhelm, or lingering low mood.

Acknowledging these signs is the first step in addressing them.

Practical tips to keep New Year anxiety at bay

Explore your values

Rather than focus on what you should do, think about what is important to you. Start by considering the choices you’ve made in the past few months. Are there some that felt good? What was the reason for the choice? And what about the ones that didn’t feel so good? Why not? As you explore this, you might notice a pattern. Is there something that you feel passionate about which influences your choices? Something which means certain choices didn’t feel right? Some examples of values I’ve heard in my therapy room are:

• “I value my marriage”
• “I value honesty”
• “I value the lives of other living things”
• “I value adventure”
• “I value freedom”
• “I value my education”
• “I value my health”
• “I value connection with others”

Around five core values, give or take a couple on either side, works well for most people. You can view your values as a compass. They are guidance for how you want to live your life. Unlike goals, they don’t have an endpoint, and there isn’t something specific to achieve. If you value east, you can keep moving east forever there is always more East to come. Some people like to write their values somewhere they’ll see them daily or stick them up on a wall. When you make your choices each day, you can refer to your values and check you’re on the path that’s important to you.

Set realistic goals

If values are the compass, short-term goals will ensure you remain on the right path and nudge you back if you slip off. For example, if you value your marriage, you might set yourself the goal of a weekly half-hour check-in with your spouse. A small amount of time to listen, share and plan. If you value your health, you might schedule a time to go for a walk each day and write a list of the vegetables you’ll buy to help you ‘eat the rainbow’. If you value connection with others, you might set yourself the goal of making and sustaining eye contact with one person each day.

Goals work best when they are short-term. If you have a long-term goal, find some short-term goals that can act as markers along the way. For example, if you value your career, you might want to add a long-term goal of promotion. Find some short-term goals that help you value your career and keep you on the path to promotion. So you continue to feel the motivation to make choices that align with this value, even if the promotion is months or years away.

You do not have to make the new year grand or life-altering. Values are life choices; they are the things that will make your life feel full of purpose and meaning. The choices you make each day to help you live in alignment with your values do not always feel good in the moment.

As I finish writing this article, I’m looking out of my window to a cold, dark, wet outside. I value my health, and I choose to go for a run each day. It will take a bit of a push from my inner voice to get me out there. I will feel cold, I am a bit tired, it won’t be the most fun thing I do each day. But when I get home, I’ll feel pleased that I’ve done something today that keeps me on my path of valuing my health. I’ll feel pleased I stuck to my commitment, and of course, my health – physical and mental – will benefit, and that is my aim.

If you find it challenging to align your values with realistic goals or keep anxiety at bay during this reflective time, hypnotherapy can offer valuable support. By helping you uncover the unconscious patterns holding you back, hypnotherapy creates space to reconnect with your true values and focus your energy on meaningful goals. Whether it’s overcoming the fear of failure or reducing overwhelm, hypnotherapy provides practical tools to navigate the new year with confidence and clarity.

It’s not about being perfect or transforming overnight. It’s not about having fun in every moment. It’s about progress, self-compassion, and finding purpose in life through the choices you make each day.