How to lower stress as a parent during your child's exam season

It is that time of year when teenagers are stressed and anxious about exams, and parents can feel helpless. However, having worked with many parents and teenagers, I can happily say that you can do some very simple things to help keep stress levels down for both your child and yourself.

13 tips to help lower stress during your child's exam season

1. Keep yourself in check

If you are in a good place, then you can deal with your child's stress a lot better. Take time out for you (this is not selfish, this is the most selfless thing you can do – if you feel good, then your child gets the best of you). Read a book, eat well, exercise and socialise with positive people. You can also consider seeing a hypnotherapist who will help you feel more in control of the situation. A relaxed parent is a relaxed child!

2. Keep the working surroundings peaceful for your teenager

A quiet, organised home will help keep their mind calm. Maybe help them tidy their room or designate some office space for them.

3. Encourage your child to foster healthy habits

Encourage your child to eat healthily, exercise and, most importantly, take regular breaks. Science suggests that our brain starts to lose focus after 50 minutes. Lots of short, focused revision slots are much better than three hours with no breaks, which limits productivity.

4. Always praise your child's efforts and not the results

The efforts will get the results. Remind them that they can only do the best they can, and that is good enough. Quote to them any other areas of their life where they have found things a challenge and succeeded through determination and dedication.

5. Listen with empathy when your child feels stressed

Don't advise unless they ask for it, instead, you could say things like "I am here if you need help." Remind them that feeling anxious is normal at this time of their lives and that it is temporary.

6. Remind your child of what they will be doing after their exams

The brain will then feel safe as it can see the positivity. You can also use this technique when they revise, remind them of what they can do after they have completed their revision.

7. Use outside help like hypnotherapy

Hypnotherapy can help to reduce anxiety and stress, so your child will remain in a solution-focused frame of mind. The work and overwhelm that comes with exams and studying can be frightening for your child, which means they are very likely to move into the 7-year-old part of their brain, which is responsible for fight or flight.

Hypnotherapy can help keep your child in the part of the brain which is responsible for solutions. This way your child will feel in control, confident and more focused. It is lovely to watch clients grow from someone who doesn't know where to start with their revision to seeing someone who feels in control, relaxed and happy. It is a much more productive way to be!

8. Download a relaxation track

Download a relaxation track that your child can listen to before they go to bed or when they have a break in between revising. This will help calm their mind for when they next revise. 

9. Learn how to take control of your brain

It is so important for your child and you to feel the 'boss' of your brain; you can do this by starting to take control. A great technique to mention to your child is the '5-4-3-2-1' technique. As soon as your child or you start to think negatively, say internally or externally '5-4-3-2-1'.  This helps your brain move into the intellectual part of the brain, where it is more rational.

10. Focus on what your child is achieving with their revision

Focus on what your child is achieving with their revision, not what they are not, and remind them of this. The more you and your child focus on what they have achieved revision-wise wise the more encouragement the brain has to do more.

11. Practise good sleep hygiene

Make sure your child is going to bed early with no technology. The brain needs time to reboot. 

12. Encourage your child to get outside

Encourage your child to get outside, whether it is a walk or playing some tennis, or meeting up with friends.

13. Remind yourself that this is temporary

Remind yourself that this time in your child's life is temporary and they are very likely to be OK, whatever results they receive.

You can do this!