How hypnotherapy can help you overcome social anxiety this season

Social anxiety can be particularly challenging during the festive season, as parties and gatherings are the norm. For many, these events trigger self-doubt, fear of judgement, low self-confidence, low self-esteem and discomfort. Sometimes it can come from bad experiences from childhood. I used to hate school Christmas parties because of the noise, chaos and terrible food. Years later I realised that I was an introvert and found ways to focus on a best friend, instead of the whole party. 

Christmas office parties were something to endure as it was frowned upon to miss it. It showed that you weren’t a team player. As I got older, it became easier and since training as a therapist, doesn’t bother me in the slightest. Hypnotherapy offers a powerful solution to overcome social anxiety, and building confidence and resilience so you can enjoy the festivities with ease.

Understanding social anxiety and its impact

Social anxiety is more than shyness; it involves intense fear of social situations where you may feel judged, criticised, or humiliated. During the party season, the pressure to appear confident and sociable can amplify these feelings. If you are an introvert, you can use a great deal of energy just by being sociable. Unfortunately, increased stress makes it more difficult to think what you might say in a conversation, so drives the anxiety up even further. Along with cognitive behavioural therapy to understand where these beliefs come from and how to change them. Solution-focused therapy to keep you in touch with your goals and how to move towards them. Hypnotherapy targets the root causes of social anxiety, helping you reframe negative thoughts and develop a more positive mindset.

Why alcohol isn’t the solution to social anxiety?

Many people turn to alcohol as a quick fix for social anxiety, but it often exacerbates the problem. While alcohol may initially reduce inhibitions, it also impairs judgement and communication skills. Furthermore, alcohol can disrupt sleep, leading to heightened anxiety the next day. It can impair your judgement of other people’s intentions and put your safety in jeopardy. You’re much more likely to find yourself in an embarrassing situation if you’re drunk. Sometimes the shame has been so bad for some people it forces them to quit their jobs. Hypnotherapy equips you with healthier, sustainable coping strategies, eliminating the need for alcohol to manage anxiety.

Although many of my past clients were initially hesitant about abstaining from alcohol at these events, they all said they enjoyed themselves more because they felt more in control. In cases where people feel embarrassed and coerced into drinking because everyone else was, they found their strategies, worked. Often choosing non-alcoholic beer, wine or mocktails to drink with their Christmas meal.

Tips for starting conversations at parties

One of the most daunting aspects of social events is knowing what to say. When I see younger people with this anxiety, a great deal of the problem is just a lack of experience. I usually explore some of the subjects they may face during an office party, for example. Here are some easy conversation starters:

Compliments: “I love your outfit—where did you get it?”
Seasonal topics: “Have you planned any trips over Christmas?”
Previous experiences: “Did you go to the party last year? What was that like in comparison?”
Current events: “Did you see the recent news about [topic]?”
Shared experiences: “How do you know the host?”, “Have you been to this restaurant outside of the Christmas season?”

I ask clients to name any friends or colleagues they find themselves most at home with. What sort of thing do you talk about at work, or with friends? Keep conversations light and appropriate. People on the autism spectrum, including those with Asperger’s, may find it difficult to connect to a topic in conversations. If this applies to you, be open with your colleagues. Many people today are understanding of these conditions and willing to help.

Building social confidence through visualisation

Visualisation is a core component of hypnotherapy for social anxiety. During a session, I ask my clients to score where they are currently and what the 10 out of 10 best-case scenarios would be. Using this answer, based on the client’s idea of how they want the party to go is key. Your idea of a party differs greatly from person to person.

If you’ve had a terrible traumatic experience during or after a party, then this is best dealt with using trauma techniques such as the Rewind or EMDR. Once you’ve changed the way you feel about the traumatic event, you can use visualisation to get your 10. This mental rehearsal rewires your brain, creating new neural pathways associated with confidence and ease in social settings.

I use an NLP tool called Ring of Confidence with clients. They visualise the situation they felt most confident in doing. I ask them to hone in on the sensation of confidence. Turning up the volume on it. Giving it a colour, taste or texture. Then I ask them to hold onto the feeling and visualise a social situation, and how better it becomes when holding this feeling of confidence. This is something they can practice on their own.

How to handle negative thoughts and reactions

Social anxiety often stems from a fear of negative judgment. Hypnotherapy helps you reframe these thoughts, shifting from “What if they don’t like me?” to “What if I bring value to this conversation?” If you do encounter negativity, hypnotherapy equips you with tools to respond calmly, maintaining your confidence. Learning to not care so much about what other people think is a bonus. Knowing that your values and beliefs are valid shouldn’t allow others to undermine you. Remember that they may be drinking too, which will impair their judgement. It’s ok to walk away from someone who is not respecting you, and your personal space.

Key benefits of hypnotherapy for social anxiety

• Reduced stress and nervousness
• Improved confidence and self-esteem
• Enhanced ability to manage conversations
• Long-term resilience against anxiety

This festive season, let hypnotherapy be your guide to navigating social events with ease and grace.