Are you seeking a divorce in your relationship with alcohol?

What does changing your relationship with alcohol mean to you? If it were a marriage, would you be seeking a divorce from your drinking?

In this article, with the help of interviewees, we are going to offer honest insights that might help you in your ‘break-up’ and new beginnings.

Before reading further, find a pen and paper and start by writing your own answers to the following 10 questions:

1. What does drinking too much alcohol mean to you?
2. How would you describe your relationship with alcohol?
3. Are you making choices based on where and when you can have a drink?
4. How much of your day do you find yourself thinking about alcohol?
5. To what extent does alcohol control your choices?
6. Do you feel you have the strength and resolve to stop drinking?
7. What about the benefits of quitting? Do you think they are enough?
8. How long before you expect to feel the benefits of quitting?
9. What are your associations, rituals, and routines when it comes to drinking?
10. Have you tried quitting before? What happened?

As you read on, make a note of which elements of the following stories reflect/resonate with your own answers. 

Breaking up with alcohol: Stories to reflect on

Did you try ‘Dry January’?

"...Straight after Christmas and New Year, it seemed obvious to try 'Dry January' and I did, the problem was I was counting down the days to February when I would start drinking and binged in February."

There are some helpful apps that enable you to keep track and recognise your achievements. 

Describe your relationship with alcohol and how it has changed

"My relationship with alcohol has changed significantly. Previously, alcohol was central to my daily routine – it influenced where I ate, the places I visited, and my activities throughout the day and evening. Drinks like wine or champagne were often on my mind. Now, I find that I rarely want or need alcohol, and I think about it much less frequently. Occasionally, I might have a glass of champagne for a celebration or special meal, but usually I only have a few sips before passing the rest on. Overall, alcohol no longer plays a leading role in my life."

For some people, the divorce means no contact, for others, there is a new relationship.

"Reflecting on the experience, the most significant benefit has been having more time to engage in a variety of activities. Previously, lunch breaks might have been spent choosing a pub or having an extended meal, which often left the rest of the day less productive. Now, there are more opportunities regarding how that time is used, including building relationships and interacting with others. The greatest change is improved use of time, but there have also been positive effects on relationships. There is greater calmness, fewer regrets about words or actions, and overall, every aspect of life has shown improvement compared to before."

Sometimes there are surprising benefits, more time, money, and choices.

How did you find the motivation and resolve?

"The first month was the hardest for me, especially when I missed having wine. I often reminded myself that I was stronger than the urge to give in and that I wouldn't let it control me. It felt like ending a relationship – I refused to let it get the better of me. To cope, I'd go to bed early and read or write, which weren't activities I associated with drinking. Social outings were tough since I couldn't find other drinks I liked, but I stayed determined, treating it almost like going through a breakup."

Getting through the alcohol break-up, easier with time and distance.

How did you keep going?

"After changing my relationship with alcohol, I began to substitute previous habits with different options. For instance, I started choosing alternative beverages such as zero-alcohol drinks, green tea-based kombucha, and elderflower drinks. Several months later, when offered a glass of champagne for a toast, I observed that the taste of alcohol was noticeably strong, indicating that my taste preferences had shifted toward these alternatives.

"Navigating these changes requires going through an entire yearly cycle to overcome seasonal associations with prior routines, such as enjoying a bottle of wine outdoors during summer. Over time, one learns that abstaining from alcohol does not equate to missing out but rather offers new perspectives and habits. Occasional moments of nostalgia may arise—such as during celebrations or specific routines – but adapting to new patterns ultimately leads to a more balanced lifestyle."

Making positive changes often starts with a conscious decision to do what is right for your well-being, whether it concerns your health, relationships, mindset, or overall happiness. When committed to change, individuals typically find the strength to persevere, and over time, the process becomes more manageable. Research suggests that it may take up to two years for significant transformations in thought patterns to occur – this timeframe is also noted in studies examining recovery from trauma and the rebalancing of brain chemistry. 

How can hypnotherapy help: Seeking professional support

Hypnotherapy can be used alongside other treatments. In therapy, the client becomes aware of their own emotional triggers associated with drinking alcohol. The client seeks to change their behaviours associated with alcohol.  

What to expect from hypnotherapy

• Using a problem-solving approach, identifying triggers and forming a healthier relationship.
• Exploration of habits and routines which are associated with drinking.
• Understanding what motivates you to quit drinking.

Hypnotherapy for quitting drinking: Frequently asked questions

Can I give up alcohol after a single session?

Typically, it can take between six and 8 sessions. Sessions are tailored to the individual.

Will I never drink again?

Some clients seek a complete divorce from alcohol, after several sessions and support, new, healthier habits and behaviours can develop.

Working alongside talking therapies, including counselling, treatments are tailored to your needs and address the root causes and triggers.

How does hypnotherapy work?

Under hypnosis, positive suggestions to your subconscious help change specific negative beliefs and behaviours. The positive suggestions used in hypnotherapy help to change the way you react, including reducing cravings.

Hypnotherapy can also enhance the motivation to form new coping strategies.

"For me, days 1, 2, 7, and 14 were key milestones. I kept journaling my journey to alcohol freedom."