Seeking Help Is Not Weak

September 28th, 2011 by Lifestyle Therapy - Susan Leigh

Some people regard asking for help as a sign of inadequacy, but how do we learn, progress or enhance our skills if we keep ourselves apart from others. We may learn from books, personal experience or the internet, but that kind of learning may be subjective and insular. It inhibits us from widening our experience base.

Let's look at some of the ways in which seeking help is not weak:

- Working with others or within a team requires people with different skills, strengths and personalities to be able to get along. At first the mix may be a little awkward or require sensitivity. Help may be required initially to enable people to find the best ways of working together. Good manners and mutual respect enables diverse people to establish a supportive dynamic and work ethic from the start.

- Mistakes occur when people are unsure or mistaken as to how to proceed with something. Asking for help is important when someone is unsure about the next step. It's better to ask before things go wrong or serious errors occur which may have lasting implications. Providing an environment where people feel safe in asking for help is important, especially when someone is in the early days of a new job and wants to make a good impression. And learning from others' mistakes can save a lot of time and heartache.

- Other people feel valued and important when they are asked for help. It can be an important way of ensuring that a person feels useful and special. Being thoughtful enough to ask for help can enable the other person to feel more confident and is a simple way of boosting a person's self-esteem. It can be a generous gesture at times.

- Children enjoy it if they feel they know more than the adults in their life. Technology is one area where children are often far more adept than their parents. They relish their superior knowledge, proving how clever they are whilst high-lighting how hopeless their parents are. It can be good for children to be asked for help so that they see that they can do well and be better than their parents in certain areas and skill sets.

- Relationships often include negotiation around any imbalances. Many homes have jobs that are designated his and her domain. Often help is needed if one person moves out of their comfort zone. Supporting each other is an important way to keep personal contact and be involved in each others lives. Many people enjoy having the familiar routine of their particular jobs, whilst regarding them as part of their intimate home life. Sharing and asking for help enhances that intimacy.

- Health is one area where many people are stoic. They feel that if they ignore something it will get better or go away on its own. Occasionally that may be the case, but health is too important an area to gamble on and asking for help can enable something to be rectified sooner rather than potentially become more serious. Even asking for help with the provision of regular food, exercise, domestic chores at home, can ease stress and make a difference to health by providing more opportunity for relaxation and social time.

- Stressed or distressed people may find that they are repeating negative patterns that have recurred intermittently throughout their lives. There may be learned habit patterns, unhelpful behaviour, low personal expectations that serve to hold them back from being successful in the different areas of their lives. Seeking help through counselling and hypnotherapy can be an effective way of letting go of those negative patterns in order to become more positive. Making the choice to address those issues is an important commitment to oneself and a sign of strength.

Asking for help is often a sign of strength, a determination to take charge of a difficult situation and find the best way to deal with it. In fact there are many businesses which are only too happy to provide help for busy people. From dog-walking, shopping, cooking meals, collecting children from school, providing help and support has now become an important area of business development.