Think back to the last conversation you had. Was it face-to-face? Was it over the phone? Or was it via text? For many of us, texting has become the go-to method of communication, but we shouldn’t confuse texting with talking.
It can be easy to pick up our phones and engage in long text message conversations with friends and loved ones. We talk about big issues, we argue and we make up – all over text. The problem is, because of the nature of texting, it can be incredibly easy for messages to get misconstrued.
The message becomes flattened, as texting irons out the meaning that normally fleshes out our words. Ironically, texting can also make us feel more isolated. Initially a text message can make us feel connected, but in the long-run it is a poor substitution for real intimacy.
Text messages should really only be used for getting quick messages across – “What time are you getting here?”, “Can you pick up some milk on the way home?” and even “Can you call me when you’re free?”.
If you think you are texting too much, take a look at the following pointers to help you talk more and text less.
Save ‘real’ talk for over the phone or face-to-face conversations
If someone starts a deep conversation with you via text message, reply asking them to call you instead or arrange a time when you can get together in person to discuss it. Trying to tackle big conversations over text can be full of communication pitfalls.
If you’re dating someone new, try calling instead of texting
When you start a new relationship, texting often becomes the default method of communication as it’s less nerve-racking. Try to be brave though and give him/her a call. You’ll become intimate more quickly and get to know them far better.
Don’t respond to every text message instantly
It can be tempting to reply to every text you get instantly, but it’s important to remember you don’t have to. Set boundaries that work for you and only reply when you have the time. This will also reaffirm to the people texting you that this isn’t your preferred method of communication.