Jim's journey: A story of hidden struggles and healing

Jim came to me for clinical hypnotherapy, seeking help with his mental health. He was in his late fifties, a quiet and thoughtful man who had spent much of his life battling feelings he couldn’t quite understand. 

As he sat in my office, he shared his experiences growing up in the 1960s and 1970s — a time when mental health was not acknowledged, let alone addressed.

Jim wasn’t just here to heal the present; he was here to unravel the past.

Childhood in a strict school system

Jim grew up in an era where schools focused on discipline and obedience. Teachers were figures of authority, and children were expected to conform without question. Corporal punishment was common; Jim recalled the cane being used regularly, not just on the so-called "naughty" children but on anyone who stepped out of line.

Jim had always been a sensitive child, prone to deep thoughts and occasional nervousness. But in a world where emotions were dismissed, his anxiety went unnoticed. The first time he had a panic attack, he was nine years old. He remembered feeling breathless, his heart racing, his vision blurring. But no one understood what was happening — not his teachers, not his parents, not even Jim himself. Instead, he was told to "pull himself together."

"I was off school for a week after my grandfather died," Jim told me. "I was having these attacks, but no one knew what they were. They told me to say I had glandular fever. Panic attacks weren’t a thing back then."

The lack of mental health awareness

As Jim grew older, his anxiety deepened, but he had no words for it. Mental health wasn’t discussed in schools or homes. If a child was struggling, they were either ignored or disciplined. Jim often felt overwhelmed in class but feared speaking up. He watched as other children who struggled were labelled "troublemakers" and punished.

"There was this boy in my class," Jim said. "I remember he used to get really angry. Looking back now, I think he had ADHD, maybe anxiety too. But they just saw him as bad. He got the slipper so many times, and eventually, he just stopped caring."

The same applied to Jim. He learned to keep his fears to himself. When his stomach churned with anxiety before a school presentation, he forced himself through it. When he felt trapped in crowded places, he told himself he was being silly. But over the years, the anxiety didn’t disappear — it just buried itself deeper.

The stigma and silence

Society at the time didn’t recognise mental health struggles, especially in children. There was an unspoken rule: Boys were meant to be strong, and emotions were weaknesses. Jim grew up believing that what he felt was unusual, something to be ashamed of.

"My dad used to say, ‘You’ve got nothing to be stressed about. You don’t have a job, a house to pay for.’ He didn’t understand that kids can struggle, too. We just didn’t have the words for it back then."

This stigma followed Jim into adulthood. His struggles continued, but he found ways to cope — pushing through, ignoring his feelings, and pretending everything was fine. It worked, for a while until it didn’t.

The breaking point and seeking help

By the time Jim came to me, he had spent decades hiding his anxiety. It wasn’t until he experienced a panic attack in a supermarket, his breath shortening, his chest tightening, that he realised he needed help.

"I thought I was having a heart attack," he admitted. "It was terrifying. But the worst part? It felt exactly like when I was a kid. I realised I’d been carrying this for 50 years."

Jim had never spoken about his childhood anxiety before. As we worked together through hypnotherapy, he began to uncover memories long buried — the fear in the classroom, the loneliness of struggling in silence, the shame of feeling "different."

The healing process

Through our sessions, Jim learned to reframe his past. He realised that he hadn’t been weak; he had simply been a child without support. He learned relaxation techniques to ease his panic attacks, visualised himself as a confident, calm person, and gradually let go of the belief that he had to suffer alone.

One day, after weeks of progress, he sat in my office and smiled. "I wish I could go back and tell little Jim that he wasn’t broken," he said. "That it wasn’t his fault. That he wasn’t alone."

A new perspective on the past

Jim’s story isn’t unique. Many who grew up in the 1960s and 1970s were left to navigate their emotions without guidance. The discipline-heavy school system may have created structure, but it also silenced those in need.

Fortunately, times have changed. Mental health is now a recognised part of education, with support systems in place for children who struggle. While Jim can’t rewrite his past, he takes comfort in knowing that future generations won’t have to endure the same silence.

Jim’s journey through hypnotherapy was about more than managing anxiety — it was about finding peace with a childhood that didn’t allow space for emotions. As he left our final session, he carried with him a newfound sense of self-compassion and a hope that no child today would have to suffer in silence as he once did.

For those who grew up in an era where mental health wasn’t acknowledged, healing is still possible. The past may not have offered understanding, but the present can. And like Jim, many are now finding the support they always needed.