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How hypnotherapy can help the lasting effects of an abusive relationship

One in four women and one in six men (http://www.lwa.org.uk/understanding-abuse/statistics.htm), will at some point in their lives experience domestic violence - as for emotional abuse, which is so much harder to define and report - in all likelihood, far more are affected and without support, are likely to suffer for much longer.

Both domestically violent and emotional abusers deliberately attack the confidence and self-esteem of the victim, it can start out as mundane as moaning about their driving style or how they dress, but over time, it will escalate to the point where it seems the victim can do nothing right - even if they do everything that is asked of them, change their appearance and cut out friends and family.

If the victim shows any signs of leaving or telling someone else, the abuser will usually apologise profusely make declarations of undying love and assert blame on the victim to justify their behaviour, leading to the victim doubting themselves - because they love their abuser this then breeds inner turmoil.

The whole process is made to isolate and reduce the victim to a shadow of their former selves. There are many things the abuser may gain from such behaviour, they are in need of help right from the start.

Family and friends may well see the changes in them and give them the courage to stand up for themselves, which is why alienation is necessary, it effectively leaves the victim absolutely vulnerable to any and all that is thrown at them- emotionally or physically.

This situation becomes all the more difficult when children are involved.

Emotions that arise from such abuse can be fear, anger, guilt, sadness, and jealousy. Not to mention the damage to confidence, self-esteem and sleep- all of which a good hypnotherapist can rectify. This sort of emotional trauma can take time to get over.

I write this from my own perspective as a domestic violence survivor and advocate. If you are worried about anyone you care about, please do not wait to offer help. You are not interfering. You may even save a person's life.

Statistically, abusers don't change, their victims do - either because they finally get the courage to leave and the abuser finds another, or worse the victim gets injured, alerting the emergency services to their situation. If you are worried about a new partner and want to see if they have been reported for domestic violence, you now can under Claires Law. 

If you are affected by the above: Get help, stay strong, get out!

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Written by Karen Lee Clinical Hypnotherapist- Blossom Therapy Swaffham

Karen Lee has always had an interest in helping others help themselves, after two years online voluntary work in a group she set up herself, she is now a qualified hypnotherapist, EMDR specialist and is studying to achieve a BSc hons degree in psychology, looking to become a psychologist in the next few years.… Read more

Written by Karen Lee Clinical Hypnotherapist- Blossom Therapy Swaffham

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