Rage - So Much a Part of Modern Life.

April 8th, 2011 by Lifestyle Therapy - Susan Leigh

We are likely at some time in our life to either find ourselves feeling rage at the most irrational situations or be on the receiving end of someone elses fury. Why does rage seem to feature so much in modern life? Stress is often a key component of anger and rage. People are often under so much pressure. Time, money, pressure to perform well are all factors of day-to-day life and can build up until frustration erupts in inappropriate rage.

Let's look at some of the most common forms of rage in modern life:

- Road rage is experienced by most of us at some time in our driving career. Many people find themselves ranting and swearing at someone who has suddenly pulled out in front of them or has failed to indicate their intentions. Often the most gentle people find themselves swearing and flashing their lights. It can be a release of tension in a busy day but is often a shock when they realise how they are behaving. Some of us find ourselves being cursed at for minor errors and it can be quite frightening at times. Stress and the difficulties of travelling on our roads is becoming increasingly prevalent.

- Trolley rage is another manifestation of people feeling stressed and loathe to queue. People can get especially annoyed at having to wait a few minutes for the person in front to finish their transaction. We have all felt that the other check-outs at the supermarket are moving faster than the one we are in. It can be frustrating, but sometimes it is worth picking up a newspaper or magazine and looking through it whilst queueing. It can help alleviate the tension and the few minutes waiting can go much more calmly and quickly.

- Work rage can happen when we feel unappreciated, feel that we are the one doing all the trivial jobs, or conversely that we are being given lots of complex work whilst everyone else is getting an easier time of it. If we feel that we are working hard but no one notices or appreciates our efforts it can be frustrating, de-motivational and tiring. Sometimes we need to keep a record of what we are doing and have a meeting with our manager. Communicating our frustrations in a calm, professional way may lead to the situation being addressed.

- Partner rage. Often we can feel unappreciated by our husband or wife. We can feel that we are doing everything, that they take us for granted, fail to see how supportive we are and how much we do each day. Rage can simmer and erupt, often over the most trivial of things. And then we can feel worse because we look foolish for getting so annoyed over a minor issue. It is more constructive to try to find time to communicate how we feel or perhaps learn to stop doing things when we are beginning to feel irritated or tired. It is far better to leave a few things undone than to have a major row because of feeling weary at having done everything ourself. We have to take some responsibility for how we behave and the choices we make. Learning to ask for help and share tasks is often the way forward in this situation.

Rage often comes from feeling stressed and over-tired. Learning to recognise our warning signs of feeling tense, irritated, distressed can enable us to take some control over our choices. It is important to schedule some fun, perhaps let some jobs wait until another day or ask for help. By taking some responsibility we improve our quality of life and help others around us to have a less stressful time too.